Another Open Letter to Aam Aadmi Party

Dear Aam Aadmi Party,
I supported you, I donated my hard earned money to you,wrote cryptic blogposts telling how you are my only savior. I genuinely felt that you will bring change and I followed Delhi election updates more than I follow live cricket. It was just so good, I took pictures wearing muffler, wrote “Proud AAP supporter” as my email signature, fought with friends over your criticism and even persuaded people to vote for you. Never have I ever been involved with something this passionately. Well,What a fool I was!!
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First few months were great, I really felt that center is not allowing you to work because they are humiliated with their defeat. Mohalla clinics will make sure everyone is healthy, son of a rikshawalah will share a bench with your own son. I was the batman of facebook, fighting bhakts and those stupid nationalists. Wherever people were making fun of you, I was there to defend you. I was your loyal ground troop.
I guess that’s when our honeymoon ended.
Fast forward to an year later, you started opposing everything center did. Schools and clinics were nowhere close to finish. You left Delhi to campaign everywhere. All that brouhaha was over making way for commotion. Suddenly there was just no difference between you and the people who you used to oppose. Your leader was talking nonsense all over the place. My trust began to erode. I silently smiled whenever someone shared a Kejriwal joke with me. Deep down I knew that I made a mistake.
And then you did something unimaginable, you stopped taking criticism, you started to believe you are the only right thing. Instead for finding out ground realities you blamed electoral losses on EVMs. Instead of fixing a problem, you just didn’t acknowledge it. I was done supporting you at that moment. I don’t mind associating myself with a losing side if they are true to their principles but not with assholes who run away from responsibilities.
And now again, when you have lost MCD elections. You blame EVMs, on everything but your work. You shamelessly ask me for more donations. Don’t be the new congress, I just invested too much on you.
Lastly, Do you remember what you used to preach about true democracy. Where people have the right to call back their representatives. Take a hint, RESIGN!! Come back when you know how to run a government.
Trust me, if you don’t change. I will be the one making jokes on you.
Your Ex-Supporter,
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Another Open Letter to Aam Aadmi Party

Letter to 40 year old myself

Dude, Sorry I mean Sir,

You are a middle aged man now, I am sure you are wiser, meaner and much less attractive. Jokes apart, do you know that the average life expectancy just about 100 years back was 40 yrs. If you were born a century back, you might have been counting your remaining days, but with technology I am sure you still have some more time left in this planet.

However, I really want to ask you those questions that bug me right now. I wish those answers can be seen in a goblet right away and I didn’t have to go through the exercise of writing this letter. But that’s life, isn’t it!!

Did you find love? Were you finally able to see in someone’s eyes and felt that this was the world to you?And even the bigger question, was she able to see in your eyes and felt that this was her world? Or you just survived, managed to keep your expectations lower and realized its all bullshit fed to you over all these years.

Did you realize the true meaning of your life? I know that you are not that kind who will be most successful guy(Read: Developer) in the world? You just don’t have that passion towards it. But, I am sure if you work towards your interests you could find bigger things, bigger issues of life.

Did you get the guts to go to stage and do stand-up comedy? I know it is difficult, but you have the stories. Go ahead and tell them. If Rahul Gandhi can do it, why not you?

Did you wrote a book? I know it will have 10-15 readers, or maybe just you. But you should have given it a try by now.

Did you go to Brazil and spend your honeymoon in New Zealand?

But the biggest question is, are you still a nice guy? Are you still a proud citizen of the world? How much have you contributed to the society? How many people think that you have changed their life? Do you still stand by your principles? And are you able to keep your distractions away when you know your goals(I can’t).

Answer me, are you a disappointment??

With love,

Your 26 year old self

Letter to 40 year old myself

Why I would not like to go back to India

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I was a inquisitive child, I used to read and read a lot. My simple pleasures were reading books.  I attempted to read books which my mom used for teaching chemistry in college when I was 8. None of my friends wanted to get a telescope as their birthday present, they were happy with their toys or with a mere box of chocolate. But, I was different, I used to wonder about things. Watching night sky with my mom was the biggest pleasure I used to have in those days. I wanted to be astrophysicist. Beautiful memories!!

I was no genius, yet those simple things meant a lot for me. Science fairs, Planetariums and Science Quizzes was where I wanted to be all the time. 

My parents tried to provide me the best stuff that was accessible in my small hometown. Well, getting a telescope was beyond anyone’s reach. Those desires were left inside the young heart. 

Middle School was full of fascination, I used to watch high school students doing experiments in those dirty laboratories. Those physics experiments are full of excitement I used to feel. I couldn’t have been more wrong in my life.

Priorities started to take control as soon as I kicked high school. Those things which I loved in my childhood were nothing but part of big cramming sessions. Those chemicals reactions were not even science. I was supposed to cram those reactions and write those in exams. Physics and Mathematics were filled with hundreds of formulas that I was expected to use in the exam. And those laboratories were nothing but an easier way to earn more marks. Innovation is nowhere to be seen.

We are always taught to take the blame on ourselves. Atleast, thats what I did for most part of our life. I always felt that its my problem that I couldn’t go to IITs for my engineering. But, what if I was never meant to be an engineer. Was it my fault that being good at mathematics would only result in being an engineer?

Thats my story, I come from a country which only produces millions of engineer!! 

Nobody who ever knew me would have thought that I will write this. I love my motherland more than anything. I used to feel bad when I hear about the people who go to US and never come back. But after three years here, I can more than justify their reasoning.

Is it wrong to make your life better? Is it wrong if I want my kid to be whatever he/she wants to be? Or is it wrong if I see India going nowhere(and I have several hundred reason for that).

There are million more things to say. Please comment and let me know what are your thoughts on this.

Why I would not like to go back to India

राष्ट्रीय शर्म

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बात कुछ ३-४ महीने पुरानी है, सिनसिनाटी ओपन उसी दिन समाप्त हुआ था और मुझे काम के सिलसिले में उसी दिन कंसास शहर जाना था| हवाई अड्डे पर काफ़ी भीड़ थी| सेक्यूरिटी चेक के लिए लंबी लाइन लगी हुई थी| मेरी नज़र सामने खड़े इक अँग्रेज़ पर गई| कुछ लोग उसके पास गए और साथ में फोटो ली| में उसे देखता रहा, लग तो काफ़ी जाना पहचाना रहा था| पर समझ नही आ रहा था की है कौन? तभी मेरा साथी मित्र मुझसे पूछा, यह नडाल है क्या, विश्व का नंबर २ टेनिस खिलाड़ी| में अपनी आँखो पर विश्वास नही कर पा रहा था| इतना महान खिलाड़ी, और यहाँ आम लोगो के बीच में खड़ा होके सेक्यूरिटी लाइन में अपना नंबर आने का इंतज़ार कर रहा है| तब समझ में आया की यह मुल्क अपने हर इक बाशिंदे को इक ही जगह रखता है| नियमो से उपर कोई नही|

हमारे हिन्दुस्तान में तो हर आदमी बस यही चाहता है की उसके साथ वीआइपी सलूक हो| जी साहब, राशन की दुकान में कन्नी से निकलके पहले शक्कर पा लें| लड़केवाले हे, हमे पहले खाना हमे परोसा जाए| अरे, वो मामा के चाचाजी बरघाट के विधायक हे, टिकिट निकलवा देंगे प्रथम श्रेणी की| घर में ४-४ बाई रखी जाए. इक करे झाड़ू, इक बर्तन, इक खाना बनाए तो इक सिर्फ़ मुन्ने की मालिश ही कर दे बस| कम से कम आस पड़ोस के लोग ही बोल पाए की हमारे पड़ोस में इक व्हिआइपी रहता है|

धीरे-धीरे देश हे बँट सा गया है, लोगो के व्हिआइपी लेवेल के हिसाब से| इक बिल्कुल ग़रीब, फिर इक थोड़ा पैसे वाला, इक उससे थोड़ा ज़्यादा पैसे वाला, फिर काले साहब लोग और आख़िर में बड़े नेता लोग और बड़े बड़े व्यापारी| ग़रीब को कोई पूछता नही, और अमीर के आस पास हज़ारो चाटुकारो के भीड़|

खैर, प्रश्न यह बनता है की इतना ग्यान देने की वजह क्या है|
कल-परसो भारत की इक बड़ी वरिष्ठ नौकरशाह जो अमेरिका में भारत की तरफ से थी, उन्हे गिरफ्तार किया गया, और बड़ी हे कठोर जाँच की गई| यह बात भारत सरकार को छू गए| मर्यादा पर दाग लग गया भारत की| हिन्दुस्तान की इक अबला नारी पर प्रतारना की गए है, अमेरिका द्वारा| ईमान तो जागना हे चाहिए ना भाई| ऐसा नही है की पहले किसी को नही पकड़ा गया| यह बात ज़रा शाहरुख ख़ान साहब से पूछिए, बिना किसी परेशानी के तो आजतक अमेरिका नही पहुच पाए वो| खैर मुद्दे की बात यह है की इस बार तो तिलमिला उठा है भारत| इक विपक्षी नेता ने तो यह तक बोल डाला की समलैंगिक अमेरिकी को उठा उठा के जैल मे डाल दो| वाह साहब, प्रशंसा तो बनती है उनकी| इट का जवाब पत्थर से देना इसे ही तो बोलते हें|

में यह सोचता हूँ की क्या अमेरिकी पोलीस खुन्नस खाए बैठी है हिन्दुस्तान से| की बेवजह इक सम्मानित शक्स को उठा के जैल डाल दिया| बेवजह क्या भारतीयो से दुश्मनी बनानी है इनको| अगर ऐसा नही है तो क्यूँ अमेरिका ने इतना बड़ा कदम उठाया| आख़िर इतना बड़ा मुल्क यह क्यूँ नही देख पाया की भारत को उसकी यह हरक़त अच्छी नही लगेगी|

यहाँ अंतर आता है सोच का, यहाँ जाके भारत की रूढ़िवादी और पुरातन सोच अलग हो जाती है विश्व से| अब यह बड़े बड़े अफ़सर जोकि हिन्दुस्तान में ठाठ से रहते हें| २०-२० लोगो का पर्सनल जखीरा सेवा के लिए रखते हें| कहाँ से रहेगे अमेरिका जैसे देश में| अब अमेरिका हिन्दुस्तान तो है नही, की औने-पौने दाम मे नौकर मिल जाए| भारत में तो ३-४ नौकरो की मिल के तनख़्वाह १०००० हो| अजी, यहा तो सरकार ने ही तए कर रखा है की कम से कम ६०० रुपये घंटे दिए जाए किसी को भी| इक नौकर की भी पगार ५००० रुपये दिन हो जो की तकरीबन ८० डॉलर प्रतिदिन है| भारत में रहके में भी सुनता तो लगता की ५००० रुपये दिन इक नौकर को बहुत ज़्यादा है| पर सच तो यह है की न्यूयॉर्क जैसे शहर में यह कुछ भी नही| बड़ी मुश्क़िल से इतनी कम पैसो में कोई रह पाए| यह पैसे इतने कम हे, जीतने मुंबई मे महीने के ५०००| अब भले ही यह तनख़्वाह अमेरिकी मापदंडो से कम हो, तब भी इक साधारण व्यक्ति इतने पैसे उड़ा तो नही सकता| अमेरिका में इतना बड़ा मध्यम वर्ग होने का यही कारण है| चाहे तुम ग़रीब हो या अमीर, नौकर रखना बहुत बड़ी विलासिता ही है अमेरिका में|

लेकिन तब भी विलासिता की आदत जाती कहाँ है हम लोगो से| हमने भी अलग हे तरीका ढूडा सस्ते नौकर पाने का| इंडिया से हे मंगवा लो, सरकार को बोलो की दे रहे हे ना ६०० रुपये घंटा| अब ग़रीब अनपड़ क्या जाने की क्या लिखवाया काग़ज़ में| वो तो बिचारा देश में मिलने वाली तनख़्वाह से ही तुलना करके खुश होता रहेगा| तो हमारी मेडम जी ने ३ डॉलर प्रति घंटा दिया , १० पर साइन करवाया| नौकर ने छ्चोड़ने को बोला, तो धमकी दी| नौकर होशियार निकली और पोलीस में खबर कर दी| मेडम जी तब भी नही सुधरी| तब भी ना मानी, अरे साहब भारत सरकार का हान्थ था ना सर पर| ऐसे कैसे भूल जाए की बहुत बड़ी वीआइपी हे मेडम| फकिरो जैसे रहने के लिए थोड़ी ना आइएफएस बनी थी| मेडम बस भूल गई थी की अमेरिका में हर इंसान इक बराबर ही होता है| अमेरिकियों ने उसकी नौकर को भी उतनी हे गंभीरता से लिया जितना की उससे| मेडम को जैल जाता देख, पूरा का पूरा आइएफएस काडर हिल गया| देश पर दबाव डाला, और देश अमेरिका पर हे चढ़ाई करने लग गया|

मुझे दुख इस बात का नही है, की इक हिन्दुस्तानी ऐसा करते पकड़ा गया| बल्कि इस बात का है, की भारत सरकार ने इस मामले को ऐसे प्राथमिकता दी, जैसे इससे बड़ा मुद्दा कुछ हो ही ना| वो नौकर ज़ो भाग खड़ी हुए मेडम की यहाँ से, उसे भारत सरकार ने फरीबी ही बोल डाला| उसके पक्ष सुने बगैर भारत सरकार ने उसके पति और बच्चे के वीसा को ही ग़लत ठहरा डाला| क्या उस नौकर की ग़लती यही है की उसने हुक्मरानो की तानाशाही विश्व के सामने रख दी| भारत सरकार को डर बस इतना है की अगर मेडम जी पकड़ा गए तो आगे आने वाले उन हज़ार अफसरो का क्या होगा? किस तरह से वो खुद के व्यक्तिगत नौकर यहाँ ला पाएँगे| किस तरह से वो दूसरे मुल्को के नियमो को तोड़ पाएँगे और क्या वो महिला जो नौकर बनके यहाँ आए थी, वो भारत की संतान नही है| क्या भारत को उसके अधिकार नही दिखते इन बड़े बड़े नौकरशाहो के सामने?

शर्म तो हम सब को आनी चाहिए दोस्तो| की हम भी भारत के इस कदम की सराहना कर रहे हें| इस बिकी हुए मीडीया की बातें सुन सुनकर हमने भी मेडम जी को निर्दोष मान लिया है| हम वीआइपी बनने की दौड़ में, हम यह भूल चुके हें की हम सब इंसान ही हे|

राष्ट्रीय शर्म

The Rise of Common Man

Its about time that we all start acknowledging the existence of Aam aadmi party, not only in Delhi but rather nationwide. I was surprised to see a facebook page for aam aadmi party of my hometown. Though they are not structurally sound,they are emerging. 

Reach: As BJP swiped the elections for yet another time in Madhya Pradesh. I was much more intrigued by the consecutive losses of congress. In many ways it was not a win for BJP, but a loss for Congress(Read Diggi). People have not yet forgotten the 24 hour power cuts during diggi rule.

This brings me to a powerful hypothesis, BJP ruled Delhi before Sheila Dixit .Under the leadership of #Madanlal Khurana, Delhi was no different then MP with Diggi. Delhi, thus gave chance to Congress thrice before throwing them out. Could BJP also sees the same fate in MP after 5 years. You cannot rule out the possibility.

BJP ruled with a powerful CM. After 10 years of BJP’s Rule, we can boast of being a power surplus state. The road coverage has increased, Total irrigated land has increased too. We do have one of the best social initiatives in the country. But is it all you need from a great leader or rather a great government.

Shocking, as it may seen. But we are the rape capital of India. Forget about Delhi, maximum number of rapes happen in Madhya Pradesh. We have to scrap off the medical entrance test in the state following the malpractices involved for several years. Our cities still have the medieval look and feel. You might say that Rome was not built in a day. But at the same time, with the pace BJP government is ruling, it will take another 100 years for Rome to be built.

What does that show? 

It shows that there is a huge space of third player to grow, that third player cannot be BSP or SP. As they are mired with corruption even more than congress. A player which can show true democracy to people. The only player that can take that place is #AamAadmiParty. And I don’t see that day far ahead when congress is out of picture. A replica of what happened in Delhi this time.

Most of the other states are facing the same problem. For instance Rajasthani people let BJP rule once and Congress the next time. Tamilnadu is dwindling between DMK and AIADMK, Maharashtra is not ruling out congress because Shivsena-BJP is worse. West Bengal mandated Mamta only to find out that they are even worse.  Could this point out to downfall of the traditional parties?

Funds: Delhi elections can be fought in 20 Crores. However, National elections needs much much more than that. There is a reason why BJP and Congress cannot declare their funds. Furthermore, they always field rich candidates. Who can shell out a lot from their own pockets. In one way, its taking common man out of politics. Which gives rise to even more corruption.

Though, wider reach will definitely give them wider donation list. But its hard to see more people shelling out money in india, where half the population is living in absolute poverty.

A better way would be giving money from electoral funds to all parties in India. This way, one can ensure than no-one is going out of way for poll-expense and will help up to build cleaner politics across the nation. However, this will require a legislature in the parliament and a much larger debate.

I also feel that taking money from NGO’s or corporate is not a bad thing as well. If you can keep all the money clean and show the receipts of all the money that you have taken. This can assure that everything is in public eyes and hence accountable.

Hooliganism: Yes, its hard for #AAP to reach the rural hinterlands of Hindi-Belt. Regional parties have strong base in these states and they will do everything to stop these new guys to reach those places.

However, if youth actually start getting into the politics, I doubt that it will be long before #AAP can make its presence felt in these regions as well.

Leadership Structure: AAP needs strong leader in the party core group. Which they already have. But on the constituency level they will require several more kejriwals and kumar vishwas. Its not impossible, but even one black sheep can break the trust they have created in public. However, it will get more cumbersome and more people will be required to shortlist the candidates. The honesty of those interviewers is again questionable.

AAP’s Stand on National Issues: National issues are very different from what they fought for in Delhi Elections. You cannot rule the whole country with populist agenda of JanLokpal or decreasing electricity bills. A clear opinion would be required on issues like Common Civil Code, Kashmir Issue and economic policies.

Still I would place my bet on AAP for 2019 polls, if not 2014. This is a disruptive kind of politics which seems to throw out the traditional players. Unless they figure out a way to tackle it.

The Rise of Common Man

१०००० रुपयो का चंदा

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वैसे, किसी ग़रीब घर के नही हे हम, पर विलासिता क्या होती है यह कभी नही जान पाए| दरी में बैठके पढ़ाई की, सरकारी स्कूल गए और धूल में ही बचपन बिताया| जब होश संभाला तो नुक्कड़ की चाय ही पसंद आती थी, यह जान ही ना पाए की केफे काफ़ी डे में आख़िर मिलता क्या है?

पिताजी की इक दुकान हुआ करती थी उन दिनो, सरल छोटा सा व्यापार किया करते थे| कहने को तो गाँधीवादी थे पिताजी, पर इक बार दुकान में इक सरकारी कर्मचारी के लिए ग़लत रसीद बनाते पकड़ लिया था हमने| फिर पिताजी ने खुद ही समझाया था की ग़लत रसीद क्यूँ बनाके दी| भ्रष्टाचार से पहली मुलाकात थी वो समझिए वो हमारी|

होश संभाला तो पता चला, दाल में कुछ काला नही दालही काली पड़ी हुई है| स्कूल में मास्टर गाँधीजी की सीख देता, और फिर वही मास्टर लाइब्ररी की किताब बेचता दिखता| कक्षा में पढ़ने वाले पिद्दी से लौडे भी जानते थी की पैसे कहाँ से आते हें| सब के सब शर्म बेच चुके थे| जिसका बाप ज़्यादा रिश्वत लेता था, वो ज़्यादा इज़्ज़त पाता था| गली में पोलीसवाला पैसा ख़ाता था| तो पोस्टमॅन बिना घूस के चिट्ठी घर में ना डालता था| हर आदमी अपनी ग़रीबी की दुहाई देके खुद को मना लिया करता था|

खैर, बड़े होते गए| खुद के लिए तो उसूल बनाया की कभी खुद इक रुपये ना लेंगे हराम का, परंतु देने से खुदको कैसे रोके| अजी, बिना खिलाए काम निकल पाता तो कराते ना| दिया पैसा, हर जगह दिया| ३०० रुपये के लाइसेन्स के लिए १४०० रुपये दिए| पासपोर्ट बनवाने के लिए पोलीस को १००० रुपये मिठाई के लिए दिए| और शायद बाकी का गिनने बैठू, तो पता चले की जितने अपने उपर नही खर्चे हे आजतक, उससे ज़्यादा की तो घूस ही खिलाई होगी|

फिर, इक दिन मान लिया हमने भी. भाई, इस देश का कुछ नही हो सकता| जितना जल्दी निकलो यहाँ से उतना बेहतर है| अमेरिका में हम जैसो की भी इज़्ज़त है आजकल| इच्छा तो थी कुछ करने की देश के लिए, पर खुद में इतनी हिम्मत ना थी| और ना कोई दिखता था, जिसका समर्थन कर सके| खैर, २००० रुपये पोस्टमॅन को दिए, अमेरिकी चिट्ठियां समय पे लाने के लिए, १०००० बॅंक में लोन के लिए खिलाए, २०००० में अपनी ही ज़मीन के काग़ज़ बनवाए गिरवी रखने के लिए, और फिर भाग निकले देश छ्चोड़ के|

शायद सारा देश ही मेरे जैसा हो गया था| डरपोक, कायर| हम खुद ही मान बैठे थे,की यह देश नही कर सकता विकास, नही बन सकता यह विश्व का सर्वश्रेष्ट देश|

निकलते- निकलते अन्ना का आंदोलन देखा था| बड़ी उम्मीद लगा ली थी दुनियाभर ने की हिन्दुस्तान की अगस्त क्रांति से बदल जाएगा देश| कहीं ना कहीं हल्की सी उम्मीद जागी भी थी लोगो को| में जानता था, यह चोर कहीं नही जा रहे, क्यूँ यह खुद को जेल भेजने का क़ानून बनाने बैठ गए|

फिर केजरीवाल जी ने पार्टी बना दी| संदेह हुआ, की चाहते क्या हे वो| सुना, पढ़ा, देखा उन्हे| सच मे इक ईमानदार व्यवस्था लाने का प्रयास नज़र आया| ६ महीने पहले जब सोचा की इन्हे हे समर्थन देना है, लोग हसे मेरे उपर| फ़ेसबुक पे सपोर्ट करता तो प्रशंसा के बदले कटाक्ष ही सहने पड़ते| पर इस बार विश्वास अडिग था हमारा भी| ठान ही लिया था की करेंगे कुछ ना कुछ पहल तो हम भी| ५००० का चंदा दिया, तो सब ने गालिया ही दी| राजनीति में समा हे गए से थे हम भी| दिनभर सियासत की बातें करते, सुनते| लगने लगा था की कुछ तो होगा| दोस्त को बोलके ५००० और चंदा दिया| आज नतीजे देखके लगता है, की शायद उन १०००० रुपयो का इससे अच्छा कोई उपयोग हो ही ना सकता था|पता नही कितने हज़ारो की तो मिठाई उन कम्बख़्तो को खिला दी|

भले ही आम आदमी पार्टी जीत ना पाए हो इस दफे| पर इक उम्मीद छ्चोड़ गई है मेरे लिए हिन्दुस्तान लौटने की|

जय हिंद

१०००० रुपयो का चंदा

What not to write in a blog

3r5w6qWell I have 100 followers on twitter(even my pathetic attempts at being witty is not increasing them), 1022 friends on Facebook(skipping 3, as they are my fake accounts, made during my illustrious career as a farmer on Farmville) and 12 followers on my stupid blog(just guessing). The point of telling this crap, or should I say calling my lovely, world’s most awesome blog “stupid” is, none of these people care if I write anything or not. Yeah, I know I am not worlds most awesome writer or even mediocre writer like beloved CB. But come on guys, leaving fake comments will not hurt in any ways (and yeah, for folks back in india, leaving comments are free). Yeah I know, someone from you loved “Jak Tak Hai Jaan” , this blog, isn’t that bad.

Finally a week back,two of my favorite people asked me if I wrote anything new. Now, that was something. Even, if you ask a desi dog why isn’t he barking for last few days, he will feel the urge to bark again. It’s just that inner feeling you get when someone encourages you. So, here I am back with my regular but unfrequent dose of stupidity.

The last time I wrote a blog like this, I was madly in love and I wanted to write more. Believe me or not, few people who actually care for you, will find a reason to love you. For her, my stupidity was my intelligence. Now she is gone and she is pretty clear that was not my intelligence.

Coming back to point, lets talk about what you should never put in your blog. And listen up to me very close, this is coming from 3 years of experience.

1. Okay, “Life is bullshit” and “god hates us all”.

Sorry, I digressed from the point. Don’t read those lines, they don’t make any sense. The point is, whatever you do. You will regret it tomorrow. Mark my word on sand, They will never change. Human life is made to make mistakes, and don’t write about those mistakes on your blog(Read this). Just to let you know, your mind isn’t made of sand. It will get into your subconscious memory. And if you ever look back to your memory palace my crap will be all over your head.

2. Do not ever write about your pain from a girl,  who you think, doesn’t read your blog. Ohh, she might read this again. But again, who cares!!  So back during my undergrad days, I was deeply in love with a girl. Who was surprisingly unperturbed about my emotions for her. So I wrote this  and copied this and copied lyrics for this on FB(still somewhere on notes there). Back in the days, I prayed to god to make her read this.

And as I said,”God hates us all” or Should I say he hates me more. He made her read all of those once I was over her. She did fell in love when it was about the time I made my decision to leave. Ohh! Come on God. That was the timing of KRK in deshdrohi. Anyways, then I wrote this. I just wish I never wrote all that. Surviving your pain is better than giving someone else that pain.

3. And as I was looking at my blogs, I found that I have written more about girls than anything else. As they say, Men are emotional fools. I prove the saying. Coming back again, Never write about your ex-girlfriend when she ditched you. 3 reasons for that:

a. They don’t give a fuck.

b. It gives them more confidence. And they continue to have the upper hand even after your stupid breakup(read this).

c. The world gets to know that you suck more in hindi than english(read this, this and this).

and yeah, she fucked me pretty bad.

4. Get this thing in your head, not everyone is J.K.Rowling or George R.R. Martin. These weirdos know what they are going to think 7 years later. Crap, I had the same urge when I wrote this. Just like nobody is waiting for Hera-Pheri 3 now, nobody gives a fuck for the 5 blogs I thought I will write.

5. Don’t write about your friends. People will read about those blogs and ask you the whereabouts like this one. Now, how to tell people, I am a jackass. She isn’t here anymore. I don’t know where in the world she is. Or you will have to say, “Okay! I am stupid”.

and the last and most important point is don’t write Crap you think is funny(read this, oh sorry you just need to refresh to see that). Because it’s not!! Well, at least that shows that I am honest and Stupid.

Adios Amigos

What not to write in a blog